Let's talk about self-care!

Why is self-care so important? Are we being just selfish? Can we afford to make ourselves a priority, emotionally, physically, and financially? Is it just the new buzzword of the moment? For most of my life I scoffed at the term self-care, I thought it was elitist and a waste of money. I felt that I needed to be responsible for my own physical, mental, and emotional health, never realizing this is the true definition of self-care.

I heard the analogy from a therapist the other day, that self-care is like the emergency oxygen mask on an airplane - you always put your oxygen mask on first before putting one on your child. I think this is so important to take into consideration. Let’s break it down: Women traditionally carry the heavier emotional, mental, as well as time workload. Statistically, we take on a larger role in raising the kids, managing the house, volunteering, perhaps working outside the house, caring for our aging parents, friends, and other family members, all the while feeling like we do not have the time or right to care for ourselves. We feel pressured to fool the world into thinking that we are ok. We invest in exterior beauty, such as make-up, hair, nails, clothing trends, and call this surface-level investment “self-care” because it’s a socially acceptable and expected response to stress – especially for women. However, inside we are in physical pain, holding stress, perhaps past trauma, anxiety and bodily challenges such as incontinence, prolapses and pelvic pain, to name a few. With society believing that self-care is limited to our exterior image, it’s no wonder that caring for ourselves gets a bad rap!

I recently watched an Instagram post where the therapist Mel Robbins interviewed Dr. Vonda Wright, an orthopedic surgeon; here’s a summary of what Dr. Wright said she witnesses when she gets called in for an emergency hip break on an older woman: 30% of women who break their hip don’t make it. The patient is in excruciating pain curled up at the end of the bed and doesn’t want to be moved because it hurts too bad from bones she never paid any attention to. She’s lying in a pool of urine due to incontinence that she is too embarrassed to tell anyone about it. She may have a urinary tract infection as well. The doctor needs to perform a 45-minute surgery to replace the patient’s hip, but the patient’s heart is too unhealthy and weak because she has been taking care of everyone else her entire life and ignoring her own wellbeing. She may have a touch of dementia, but in her lucid moments she says, “I’ve not always been like this, I don’t know how I got here, don’t ever get old.”

This percentage is staggering, but the question remains – how does this happen?  How did we get there? We can choose another path and a conscious effort to believe we are worth it to invest in ourselves. Every person and body are unique with its own challenges, and we can invest in personalized attention that makes transformative change. I invite you to come and explore the benefits of transformation with personalized attention, allowing you to meet your body where it is with no judgement or pain and fatigue, leaving feeling better than when you walked in.

​- Machelle